Friday, July 30, 2010

$126.32

Phone Rings.

Kristin: "Hello?" (sounds of cranky baby in background. some strain in my sister's voice as she is likely balancing the phone in one ear while simultaneously changing a diaper, walking the dogs and emptying the dishwasher. at the same time. new mom= multitasker extraordinaire)

Courtney: "Kristin, I have the BEST news. GUESS WHAT!

Kristin: "Whats that?!" (more activity in the background...she must be planting a garden now while repairing the roof and updating her blog. I can only assume.)

Courtney: WE JUST GOT OUR ELECTRIC BILL!!!

Kristin: "honey. we need to have a talk."
__________________________________________

OK, so that was kind of an exaggeration. She wasn't planting the garden. She was just watering it. from the rooftop where she was updating her blo....I digress.

While the endless multitasking is somewhat exaggerated (though my sister rarely ceases to amaze me!), I can say that this is actually quite close to the exact conversation we had last Friday afternoon after work. Why, you might ask, was I so excited to get my electric bill? Time to peel back some layers here.

First, a look back on our first few months in Galveston. We rented a little place on Winnie Street. Perfect size for us if a little oddly laid out. The "master bedroom" was in the front of the house with a "study" adjoined to it. Our "guest area/multi purpose" space would be upstairs while our "pantry" was just out the backdoor of the kitchen in a covered screened in porch-like area.

Why all the quotes, you might ask? Well, within a couple of months we knew this place was not going to work so well. Without any storage (minus the sauna that was our pantry), the family room became a glorified bike rack, the study a room full of books and other trinkets that had no homes and the "guest room/multi purpose" room simply became our cat's island palace. And an island it was...regarless of the temperature outside, the upstairs was a holding space for any air that circulated through this poorly constructed home. Air conditioning? To the attic! Cool breeze from the open kitchen door? to the attic! Heat during an unseasonably cold January? to the attic? And the attic...while spacious and the perfect place for our would be guests - was not insulated. Nor was the rest of the house. Nor were the windows properly sealed.

December 30th, full of Christmas cheer, we got our first gift from this charming bungalow. 450 dollars worth of charm courtesy of Reliant Energy Company. Upon further exploration with our neighbors we discovered that, come summer, we could expect 600 or 700 dollars worth of cooling costs for this home if we were expecting to live in any comfort in the summer heat.

Thank heavens that Andy was quick to suggest a 6 month lease when we first signed up. Otherwise, the summer $600 would be ours to keep until this coming November!

New to the "grad student" budget as of last August, this process of learning to truly live with less has been a cool journey for us. Back in Baltimore, we lived comfortably as TINK's for our first year of marriage. TINK, if you are wondering, is that glorious stage of financial bliss - Two Incomes, No Kids. Knowing grad school was around the corner we lived with huge margins as we saved for this next stage in the journey while also enjoying a weekly night or two out to eat when we just didn't feel like cooking.

After a couple of months here with our income stretched thinner, we are starting to realize the value in making tradeoffs. Of course we made tradeoffs back east. But these are much different - My running shoes are torn to shreds but Andy needs some new slacks. The car needs new tires but we need to buy plane tickets home. These are things we didn't really think about with great depth a year ago because we had great margin and could dip into the pot with ease. Now, since we can't save with the speed with which we did 12 months ago, each purchase is more precious.

I'll buy those running shoes in a couple of months and be really thankful to have them! We went out for sushi recently and I wouldn't be exaggerating to say that, for me, each bite was more delicious because it was special, rather then routine.

For these reasons too, a $126 electric bill was also special. Now that we are more conscious of and committed to a budget, I think we celebrate these gifts like cheaper electric bills in bigger ways. I sent Andy a text message when we got the bill and he immediately called me at work to celebrate over the phone. I could hear him smiling on the other end as he said "You see! Things are going to be OK!"

I emphasized in bold above the value of a tradeoff. I think I am recognizing the richness of that phrase more and more. We live in a world that wants everything right now. I am victim of this often. I have very little self control at Target. Now when I do go to Target though, I enjoy my finds more than I did before because they are bought with a more precious resource. I realize more clearly now why we are called to give or tithe with consistency and regularity. It keeps us grounded and grateful. We've still got more practicing to do in this area. I don't know that we are there yet. But I think God is honoring our efforts and helping us to understand gratitude and discipline as we move along. Its a good feeling to be moving in the right direction.

"Wisdom has built her house;
she has hewn out its seven pillars.
She has prepared her meat and mixed her wine;
she has also set her table.
She has sent out her maids,
and she calls from the highest point of the city.
'Let all who are simple come in here!' she says,
to those who lack judgement.
Come, eat my food and drink the wine i have mixed.
Leave your simple ways and you will live;
walk in the way of understanding."

Proverbs 9: 1-6

Monday, July 26, 2010

Veggie Tales



Happy Monday all!

Tis the first day of the work week...bleh. The good news is that I have a mind full of potential blog material. I've been getting more and more connected to this world of blogs over the past couple of months. Several of our friends in Galveston keep blogs as they too have family and friends that are scattered around the states. Just last week I discovered three friends of mine who post with regularity.

I am also realizing that I tend to do rather long posts with out many pictures every couple of weeks. Some people post pics and just short updates. We'll see if I can mix it up over the coming months.

So here's a quick word on vegetables. A few weeks ago I had a "life moment" as we got ready for bed. After finishing a weekend filled with copious amounts of barbecue, meaty Mexican food and cold cuts, I laid my head back on my pillow feeling as close to a candidate for a heart attack as I believe one can feel without actually having chest pains and shortness of breath. Ugh...you know the feeling. Fat and sweaty and disgusting. Kind of like a pig without the oink. I would venture to say that a deeper analysis of my consumption that weekend almost went to a spiritual level - living in America, gluttony is something I rarely consider - and yet, there it was, tapping on my conscience. Who'd have though a beef fajita could spur spiritual exploration? I suppose at this point I should consider nothing off the table.

So, with a great need to "confess" I stated my current state of meat overload and quickly got to the point with a hastily thrown out suggestion that we take a break from meat for a bit...breath held slightly, eyes peaking through squinted lids at my husband across the room. Keep in mind, while Andy and I have a super communicative relationship and are rarely embarrassed or disturbed to talk frankly with each other about whatever might be on our minds...I was talking to a true blue steak lovin', bbq masterin', "I don't care how much veggies you put on the pizza as long as it has pepperoni on it" husband. This man loves a nice roast beast.  To my great surprise, however, my suggestion was met with an enthusiastic.....

"SURE! that sounds great!"

Even as I write this, I don't know why his general optimism and continued willingness to try new things still continues to surprise me. There is rarely a challenge that he will not dive into with me. This. man. rocks!!

While I must say that vegetarian cooking is often a mystery to me, I decided to really dive. Tofu? I don't really get it but we're gonna give it a shot. Chick peas? I am doubtful of your value beyond a pleasant addition to my salad, but I will give you a second chance too.  With the help of my friend Jenny and her fabulous supply of cook books we went to town last week and it was awesome. Thai Lettuce wraps, stuffed grilled peppers, "labor day spaghetti", and homemade egg rolls.

I must say, I feel fantastic! We've not quit cold turkey. oh, i like that. pun totally intended :-) I've never taken great issue with eating meat or not eating meat. If someone is kind enough to invite me to their home and they are serving meatloaf...well you better believe it...we are eating the meatloaf regardless of how far I go down veggie lane. But, the cool news is that I've become a more creative cook and I've got a ton of energy. A peek in the fridge last night even brought an exclamation from the house meatatarian - "Cool! you bought more tofu!" So, think about it readers. I can even send you some recipes. If you like to cook its a fun avenue to explore.

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Summer Insanity

I can't believe its almost August! It feels like the summer is speeding through and I can't seem to catch up. On August 17th we will have officially been "Yankee Texans" for one full year. Well at least Andy will have. Stay tuned...I may have to post an interview with UTMB's latest and greatest PhD candidate for a "year in review".

As for our summer thus far, I must say it was nice to finally take a big breath this past weekend. We went out for sushi and a movie on Friday and I stayed in my pajamas until noon the next day. Awesome!

Here's some quick highlights of what we've been up to the past few weeks:

San Antonio!

Ever since my parents headed to San Antonio many years ago, I have had this city on my bucket list. It lived up to its full potential to be sure. While only there for an overnight, we were able to take in Texas' top two tourist attractions. The San Antonio Riverwalk and the Alamo. The Riverwalk was absolutely gorgeous. I must say it exceeded my expectations. The river runs through the city at ground level and has become a wonderful venue for restaurants and even a waterside theater that hosts musicians and local theater groups. We were quite impressed that this tourist destination has been able to remain largely focused on quality over quantity. While it was crowded with people, there weren't your typical smattering of densely packed t-shirt and trinket shops. It did have an incredible collection of restaurants and bistros to choose from. I think I could spend a couple days there checking out the different places to eat. Since we were only staying one night, we splurged on a stay at a bed and breakfast on the river. It was great to be able to stroll alongside the water before our dinner reservation. We ate at a delicious restaurant called Boudro's that specialized in authentic Texan fare and made fresh guacamole right at our table. Delicious! 

The Alamo was equally interesting. I really enjoy learning about history and they've done a great job of explaining the story behind the Alamo while preserving both the building and artifacts from the battle. There's a billboard of sorts outside of the barracks that gives a thorough explanation of the history leading up to the battle and then the eventual process of Texas becoming a state. Until that day, I didn't know that Davy Crockett died at the Battle of the Alamo. I actually don't think I knew that much about him at all to be honest. I think I had an image of Johnny Appleseed with a 'coon skin hat on his head holding a rifle. hmmm, Davy Crockett planting apple trees in military dress...Am I completely out of the loop? I have a feeling that Texans learn this from the moment they are out of the womb.

The Alamo


Austin

Both San Antonio and Austin have been two cities that I've wanted to visit. Interestingly enough, it was a visit from family that brought us to the capital city. Andy's brothers are talented volleyball players and came to Austin for this years volleyball championships. They spent a week in town playing teams from all over the country. We were so stoked to learn that the tournament would be so close. We were able to spend Saturday and Sunday with the guys and watch David's team start off their tournament play. Volleyball is really fun to watch because its so fast! I was quite impressed. We got to get the full volleyball experience. Cheering, dodging stray balls, snapping pictures. All this was followed by eating massive quantities of Mexican food at 10:30 at night when it was all over.  Yum! Despite a knee injury for John, it seems the guys had a great time playing ball for the week long tournament. Both teams did very well.

David Beck in action.


John, David and Dad Beck jumped in the car and headed to Galveston to round out their trip to TX. It was so exciting to have company and we enjoyed showing the guys around. I think my favorite part was walking on the beach Saturday night. We brought the dog with us and had a good time walking off the fajitas Andy had made for dinner. Coming back with sand all over our feet and a movie under our arms was the perfect way to end the day. For a hot second, I was on vacation, and loving it :-).

goofing around at the beach.



Throw in a couple trips home for graduations and weddings and that's been our summer. There's lots of fun coming up. Andy's best friend Rob has just taken a job at Sam Houston State. He now has his own room at our house (the guest room really, however we affectionately call it "Rob's room") and will be a consistent presence for sure. We'll have another visit from great friends back east and then a week off to enjoy some peace and quiet away from work and school before the fall semester begins. Stay cool, summer is half way through!

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Living Heroically

"I want to live in a manner that feels heroic, that turns the invisible to the visible, that is a solid intrusion of the eternal into the divided streets of humanity."

I love this quote. I read it in a blog of a songwriter I follow. Its kind of perplexing to me as it stopped me in my tracks and had my mind racing for a couple of hours at the end of a recent weekday. All at once I had these mixed emotions that both frightened me and excited me all at once. These words hit at something deep inside me that wants to do great things. At the same time they hit a chord in me that consistenly worries that I might someday become so obsessed with what I want to do that I pursue them to the detriment of my family, friends and/or coworkers. These two emotions collided as I thought about these words and I got into thinking mode. Philosophizing and theologizing and daydreamizing (new word. I kinda like it).



Sooo, why the mixed emotions? Any person (and certainly any American!) should read that quote and be totally juiced by the word "heroic". Who doesn't want to be heroic? My personal heroes have been those people I've met or read about who have put aside their own personal desires for the sake of a greater goal. Friends and family members who have put aside worldly successes to follow a more humble path in service to their families, churches, teams, communities, country, neighborhoods and cities. I so admire these people because they encourage in me the inkling in my Spirit that says I can be a "success" and not necessarily have the largest paycheck or the nicest car or... an Amazon Kindle... (which incidentally is now just $189 and would hold 1500 of my favorite books AND has 3G wireless AND delivers all of my favorite titles IN JUST 60 SECONDS OR LESS! Oh dear, I am salivating). I'll be honest, sometimes my most human self would really like to take hold of some of these things as my own.

While I at first thought of my favorite personal heroes, I at the same time thought about the insstances in life that I want to be heroic for heroism's sake. I've spent alot of time contemplating my own thoughts and actions over the past couple of years and there's a part of me that I don't like that rears its ugly head at times. There is a piece of me that is pompous about the opportunities I've had, about the views I hold (politically, theologically) and the ways I look at success over and against the ways others might. When at this "heroic" height, I am a super hero for my causes and nothing can get in my way! I might not say this outloud but rest assured, in my mind, I am most certainly forumulating these sentences. " Lets face it chica/chico. My ideas are just better than yours and we would all get along much better if everyone could agree on this fact and move on. Come along now, we're all getting on the Courtney Train. You can sit right next to me. smile." whoa! who is THAT lady?!

How true is this though people?! who doesn't do this at some point or other in their lives? Thus, the idea of living heroically, as suggested by this author, was quite scary to me at the same time as it was hugely exciting. Surely I want to leave a legacy in the places I walk but sometimes the legacy that leaders leave is one that people don't care to recall!  This "anti-heroism", as I prefer to call it, is the kind where I am the center of attention. I have all  the ideas, and I am always right. After a while I am out of ideas, out of energy and suddenly I am the captain of a sinking ship. That is so exhausting.

So what do I do with this part of me that actually DOES want to live heroically but in a way that is humble and that serves and that leaves a place better than the way it started? As someone who has embraced the teachings of Jesus, I realized in my ruminations on this quote that I need not be scared if I interpret the idea behind heroic living correctly. After all, what follows this author's desire for significance is a vision of success that he cannot accomplish through human effort alone. He wants to live in such a way that "turns the invisible to the visible, that is a solid intrusion of the eternal into the divided streets of humanity."

hmmmm. I've not really made anything visible that was not previously there. Nor have I been able to, in my own strength, bring eternity into a divided group. Unless you include the time I was a camp counselor in charge of a 45 minute camp class entitled "Fun with Science." These children were quite divided over the "fun" we were all having on our "nature walk" in the hot summer sun. "NATURE = SCIENCE my dear children" I remember thinking. "we have 40 more minutes until we can all go play soccer so just keep walking and enjoying this eternal walk in humidity and heat." (to this day I do not know why I was put in charge of this class. totally absurd.)

I have seen, however, that when I am at the end of my rope and I let go, a force that I have only ever adequately describe as God has indeed brought the invisible to my sight and the eternal force of love into my divided self. On this journey with God I have seen neglected, "invisible" city streets become inhabited with new families. I have seen seemingly invisible people come alive as they come to understand the concept of being loved in spite of their many failings. And I have personally felt and understood that truly godly heroism is most often attained when I commit to living each day for the Lord, stop blocking His grace, and remain open to what might lie behind the next corner.

It reminds me of an old soccer move. Your up against a defender and there's no way out. Pull back and open your gate and there's the whole field in front of you. Your defenders are at your back and you've got a new path laid out ahead. a helpful analogy I think as we finish up world cup 2010, eh?

I think when I get up every day for the next couple of months I am going to ask how I might live heroically today. Right now, I think thats going to look radically different then what I first thought it might look like as I ponder this little piece of wisdom. There have been a lot of ways in which I have tried to push my way to success. I hope I can continue to stay open in these coming months and that God will provide opportunities for me to partner with Him to make eternal love visible where there is halting division. Please pray for me that he will!